“How can we help you?” 

Thoughts offered by Narinder Dhami, President of The Sonor Foundation and Lead Executive and Co-Founder of New Power Labs

Shifting from a helping mindset to a serving mindset can help us become more effective grantmakers and funders. 

We all share the desire to help, to solve problems. It’s at the core of what we do in the impact world. 

Yet, in a blog post entitled “Serving Is Different From Helping And Fixing”, Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen suggests that the “helping mindset” might not be the best way to approach this work.

Helping is often based on inequality

According to Dr. Remen, “helping is based on inequality”. She believes that consciously or unconsciously, we use our strengths, power, and resources to help fix the problems of those less able or with less access. Essentially, the helping mindset applied to grantmaking and investing, can end up perpetuating, perhaps unintentionally, power imbalances, and reinforces paternalistic dynamics between the giver and the receiver.

Shifting to “How can we serve you?”

Serving differs from helping, in that it can be based on reciprocity and stretches us to acknowledge what we bring to the relationship, while being mindful of our limitations. 

Indigenous Australian activist Lilla Watson, working alongside Aboriginal rights groups, articulated this idea at a UN Conference in Nairobi in 1985: “If you have come here to help me, you are wasting your time. But if you have come because your liberation is bound up with mine, then let us work together.”

The concept of serving centers trust between equals, recognizing the expertise beneficiary communities hold on their own contexts. This is not business as usual: it requires holding space for dialogue, active listening, and co-creating solutions that meet the community’s unique needs. But by engaging in this way, capital deployers build trust and foster stronger relationships that can lead to more sustainable and impactful outcomes. 

When we shift to a mindset of serving, we recognize that our role is not to impose solutions but to empower and uplift communities. It requires a commitment to addressing systemic barriers that perpetuate inequity. The role of the funder, then, becomes that of an observer and facilitator, and community members engage as problem-solvers. 

What challenges have you faced when working to shift traditional power dynamics in your funding practices?

Send us an email at communications@pfc.ca to share your experience.